SELFCONTROLNEEDED.

okay, so today i totally lost it.  i don't just mean a little like i usually do.
i mean alot....  read on if you care.


well, as some of you know i hang out at K Block, which is where the rest of my friends hang aswell.
mabel, one of my dearest friends though i'm not quite sure if she's talking to me or not at the moment, has a boyfriend.  stefan.  who i totally and completely hate and have since year two.
he totally gets on my nerves and he calls me  a bitch and he kicks me sometimes.  i totally lost it with him today.


he was getting on my nerves, just being a general nuisance, so i grabbed his tie and told him to quit it.  yeah, he didn't quit it.
so i started hitting him and kicking him wherever i could, then he started crying.  then i just walked out, i was shaking but you couldn't tell.
i've never been in a real big fight before and i didn't regret one minute of it.  i don't know who's gonna talk to me at school now; because stefan cried and so mabel started crying.
everyone was coming up to me saying "why did you make mabel cry?" "you tight bitch" "you deserve to rot in hell".  like i cared about the comments, i mean come on, really.  i live in hell you stupid bitches.  i never got called out of class so i don't know if stefan told anyone yet, but if he does tomorrow then i'm not quite sure what i'll say.  is it honesty is the best policy, or is that a load of crap?


also, the woman from student support called mrs. hindley called me in today.  she showed me round this website which is for online counselling.  i mean, come on, my parents only split up it's not like anyone died.
it's kindof weird, because i never really talked to some stranger about how i was feeling.  i might not aswell.  it's too weird and they'll be too nosy about everything.
she was only trying to help though so i might give it a go.


this is the first long post i've posted in ages, sorry to have to unload all that crap but seriously guys, i need somewhere to store it.  thanks for listening to me rant on and on. :)




how was your day? :) xxx